Domestic Violence Awareness Month

As I mentioned yesterday, Becca at The Damsel of Distressed Cards has written a beautifully brave post about domestic violence. October is also Domestic Violence Awareness Month, but until I read Becca's post I had no idea.

Since Becca was brave enough to share her story, I'll share mine. It was 20 years ago, but it still affects me today. Not every day, but it's there. At 18 I lived with my boyfriend, who I'd been dating for about 2 years. He was prone to anger, to temper tantrums. He was excellent at belittling me and making me feel unworthy. He simultaneously made me feel that I was unlovable - and also that I was a slut. The emotional abuse was constant. The physical abuse began with a bang. I came home from studying with a male friend, to accusations of cheating. My cat attacked him, and he threw her across the room. I lunged at him to grab the cat away, and he shoved me so hard that I flew backwards across the room into the doorknob. I hit it between the 3rd and 4th cervical vertebrae.

I left him the next day, amidst his tears and apologies. It didn't last, though, and within a month we were together again. He even went to the doctor with me when I sought medical help again because the pain was still horrible, and the stereotypical "I fell into a door, I'm so clumsy" scene took place.

We moved back in together several months later, and the emotional abuse continued. I didn't think I deserved any better. He gave me an STD. He would grab my arms hard enough to leave handprint bruises. He was much more careful because now we had housemates to hear. One of those housemates was Rob.

Rob saved me. I would have continued to stay, but Rob encouraged me to leave - and told me that he'd help me do it, and help me rent a new apartment. Rob convinced me that I was worth being treated like I was loved. I don't think it's much of a surprise that we fell in love and married. After all, this is the man who yesterday, when I'd had an awful day full of tears, I showed him the card I made for this post, and he said "Look at that. You MADE that. When you have those days, remember that you can take a piece of paper and turn it into ART. That's amazing!"

Supplies: sentiment from MFT; all other stamps from Inkadinkado; Memento Tuxedo Black ink; Distress inks in Mustard Seed, Spiced Marmalade, Faded Jeans, Dusty Concord, Brushed Corduroy

I wanted to create something to express encouragement. And I'm out of words. It's been a long time since I told this story to anyone. 

xoxo,

Jessi